Need some help with your relationship?
Let’s just say you’re walking along and one day you meet somebody that you think, “wow” this is the person I want to go on my life’s journey with!
So you start spending time together, sharing things about yourselves with each other, making your heart flutter, and before you know it – you’re in a relationship.
It’s really a SHIP!
For anyone who follows my blog, you know I love a good analogy! So when I think of a relationship, I actually think of a “ship” – one with sails that goes out on the ocean!
Starts off smooth sailing
And when you first come together, it’s smooth sailing. One of you is happy to steer, the other is happy to navigate, you help each other out cleaning the decks – you don’t mind all this work at the start because it’s exciting and new.
Then time goes by, the journey starts to get weary.
You go through some bad weather and storms. Holes start to appear on the deck and the sails need patching up because they’re starting to tear.
Now you’re tired of always navigating, or always steering, or always cleaning…
S.O.S. (Save our ship!)
Again I love this “ship” analogy for relationships because if you think what you’ve got (relationship-wise) is really strong, worth fighting for, then if you go into rough seas or if your ship is about to capsize…
It’s no longer a matter about who’s right. Who’s wrong. Who did what or who said it first.
It’s about all hands on deck.
It’s about making sure the relationSHIP survives.
3 keys to see if you’re on the right ship
So with this analogy in mind, you can ask yourself 3 key things to see if you’re actually on the “right” ship in your relationSHIP.
- The first is: where are you going? You’ve built this ship together, you’re on this journey together but are you headed in the same direction? Being on the same ship but going in two different directions naturally puts serious strain on your relationSHIP. Understanding where you’re going together is truly the first key to building a strong, happy and healthy relationship.
- The second is: how much baggage are you carrying? Remember, you’re creating something new here so really assess whether or not you need to bring that bag on this journey. Or if something happens during your journey together, and you “bag up” an issue and tuck it away for later use, really think about whether you need to keep the ship weighed down by carrying it! Is it adding any value to the relationSHIP? Or is it just holding you back? Maybe it’s time to throw it overboard?
- The third is: maintenance. In every relationSHIP, you’re going to need to fix things along the way. Sometimes you’re going to have to do things you might not like. Sometimes you do more, sometimes they do more. The core point here is that each of you needs to put something into the relationSHIP in order to keep it up to date, keep it maintained, and keep it moving forward. It doesn’t have to be much, a surprise dinner or a simple phone call or text saying “I love you, you mean a lot to me” does wonders to help patch up cracks in the ship!
Be honest with your answers
Naturally there are a lot of variables to every relationSHIP, you may even have extra people on yours (like children!), but you still must think about where you’re going, what baggage you’re carrying, and what maintenance you’re all willing to do – in order to truly keep your ship afloat!
And when you think of these things, honestly, they will provide insights about what might be holding you back, or weighing you down, or why you’re not headed in the direction you want to go.
But with honesty can sometimes come difficulty. The hardest part of all this is that for some, your answers may prove that you might not be on the right ship at all. If that be the case, at least you are now aware and can look to improve the ship, or get off that ship so you can go in the direction you want.
I hope you found my relationSHIP analogy a little bit fun and insightful sweet friends, and I hope you can take something from it that may just help you improve your relationSHIP! #biglove and namaste
Hi Melissa. I very much enjoyed and learned from your relationSHIP video. I thought it was very insightful. Recently, (one year ago) I had to let go of a relation SHIP. I shed a tear when I watched your video. I truly believe I did everything I could to avoid that SHIP from sinking. It doesn’t mean I didn’t make mistakes but I did try to save it and came to the same conclusion that I was on the wrong SHIP. I cried because I feel I failed this person. May I also add, your statement about now is time to let go, or something like that, of who is right or wrong. May I say there is no place in a relation SHIP for right and wrong discussions. for who knows what is right and wrong. That is not to say stop discussions, they are important but debating “I’m right and your wrong” has no place in a relation SHIP. That can be carried to other types of relation SHIPs, like with co-workers. Respect has a place in all relation SHIPs at all times.
Take care and thank you Melissa.
Thank you Deane for stopping by and I’m so glad to hear you enjoyed my post! I’m so sorry about the difficulties you experienced in the relationSHIP you were in – but it was strong of you to recognise you weren’t on the correct one for your journey. And yes, I agree – my video does talk about how one must let go, there is no need for ‘right or wrong’ when the SHIP is sinking. It’s about saving what you have – if it’s the right one for you. Again, I’m so glad you enjoyed the video – and I send you much love and light for your bright journey ahead! Thank you and big love x
Beautiful analogy that paints the image of a relationship perfectly (even if one knows little about “ships”). With that, let’s say that communication is the wind for the sails. Another great blog. Thanks for sharing.
Thank you for stopping by Todd and I’m so glad you enjoyed this post! I love analogies and glad it made sense — and bless! I love the ‘communication is the wind for the sails’ — that is perfect and beautiful! Thank you so much! Keep shining, big love x