Self talk is more important than (all three of) you realise.
The little rhythmic “Me, myself and I” phrase might seem altogether void of meaning at first glance, but it actually gives us a tiny glimpse into a great self truth: When you speak to yourself, there is somebody listening. Honestly, there is. Stay with me here…
Me, Myself, and I
I have, on many occasion, heard people abuse themselves over the littlest things. Yes, I said abuse themselves, for that is exactly what they do when they say “Stupid!” or “Idiot” when they drop their keys while carrying their groceries to their car, or accidentally delete a number from their phone. Oftentimes I wonder, would this person accept that sort of language from anyone else on the matter? Perhaps yes, perhaps no.
What I’d like to draw your attention to now is, that no matter how small the negative word is (fat, ugly, useless, stupid, lazy, slack, etc) – somebody is listening – and that somebody is you. Even if you’re completely and utterly alone, when you dish out bad self talk, you are serving it up to yourself to swallow.
Who's your biggest cheerleader?
A lot of people might shrug this off and respond to me with, “I’m just saying that, but I don’t mean it really”. I beg to differ, and greatly. What’s the point to think and say anything unless it matters? If the action which spurred on the negative self talk didn’t mean anything to you, then you wouldn’t think or say it, right? The very act of uttering negative words to your self – silently or out loud – is an admission to yourself of how you feel. And who’s your biggest cheerleader? The part of you who listens. And if you don’t give yourself a good wrap, you make it harder for you to cheer yourself on…especially when you need it most.
It's just me talking though...
I expect there are many out there who now question my sanity, thinking, “What’s she’s going on about? When I talk to myself, it’s just me talking to myself, there’s no separation!” In my opinion, that is utterly incorrect. When you speak to yourself, when you think, when you day dream, when you do anything – there is, at the very least, a doer and a watcher (or listener). Stop a moment and think about that. And while you think about that, notice that one part of you is doing, while another part is listening. Yes my friend, you are more complicated and grand than you may have ever realised.
Positive self talk can change your entire life
Make a point to stop and recognize whenever you utter anything negative to yourself – and change it right away. Correct it by apologizing and replacing it with a loving and supportive statement. Who better to nurture your soul, cradle your glorious-ness, than yourself? Let me be quite clear here, I’m not talking about adding conceit or arrogance to your daily routine. What I’m talking about is giving yourself allowance to be who you are – despite the circumstance – even if, in that moment, you made a mistake, or didn’t do the best you could. This simple shift in your internal chatter from negative to positive can, and will, change your entire life – and eventually the lives of others!
Practice with yourself, you!
This process takes practice. Like learning to walk or riding a bike, don’t give up just because you don’t notice major improvements after the first few attempts. Do the best you can to avoid abusing yourself in order to teach a lesson; encourage yourself through positive self talk – such as, “The next time I’m in the check-out line, I will be kind to the girl serving me” instead of “You idiot, you didn’t have to be rude!”
Isn’t that what you would do for a family member, friend, or child when wanting to teach them something for their own good? Learning through pain or anger simply instills more of the same – pain and anger. Whereas if you talk to yourself with love and support, it will instill more of that wonderful good stuff!
What's your self talk like?
How do you treat yourself? Do say things to nurture inner growth, happiness and love? Or do you self-sabotage your life by belittling the only house in which you live in right now? You. You are too beautiful to abuse, treat yourself kindly and take care with whatever words you place after I am…
So, do you think I’m crazy, talking about us as though there is more than one of us in the same body? Or do you agree? I’d love to hear your comments, feel free to leave one below!
I love this And I needed it so much
I’m so glad you found this valuable Jessica and that it was timely for you! #biglove
I love this!
Since I was a little girl I remember talking to myself in plural, like “What are WE going to do now? Mom is going to be so angry at US” … this, I continue to do to this day and I’m 32yo, so no, I don’t think you are crazy nor am I. I love the thought of being two or more within ourselves.
Thanks Melissa! and greetings from Mexico!!
Thank you so much for stopping by, and for enjoying this post! It’s good to know you feel the same sweet friend! You are most welcome, and I hope you continue to shine your light sweet friend, big love! x
It is so true. For years I have spoken badly to myself. I will be kind and patient from now on
Bless! Thank you so much for stopping by and I’m really glad to hear you’re going to be kind and patient with yourself now Patti! You’re worth it – and keep shining! #biglove Melissa
I used to think I am not much to look at until I happened to read a book that encouraged me to self talk using the mirror. I doubted that it would change me at first but I kept going. Every morning, I looked at the mirror, smiled and said, I am beautiful. Well, I started to make new friends who guided me on improving not just my looks but also my health. Now, I see myself as a new person whenever I look at a mirror. I see the beautiful me. The transformation was nothing short of a miracle. It truly made me a believer of positive self talk.
Thank you for taking the time to visit this blog Carmen, and that is absolutely beautiful! I’m so happy to hear you’re following your heart and blossoming your true self! Keep shining sweet friend! #biglove
I try to catch myself when posing negative commentary to my own being and paying attention when others do it to themselves is a great reminder. You are absolutely right….most of us would be more gracious to even strangers when the same action occurs that causes the negative self talk. It’s only right that we give that to ourselves too!
That’s wonderful that you’re so aware Samantha! And too true – we’re often times more kind to strangers than to ourselves! Thank you for taking the time to comment! Big love to you my friend! ❤
Wonderful, so true, I like the part about a talker and a listener. That is a great way to put it.
Thank you so much for taking the time to comment Sheila, and for the kind words!! Big love to you my friend! Namaste ❤ xo
Hey lovely people – your words are so inspirational and love the fact you have reminded me about how important self talk is. Paul and I both listened to your audio and it spoke gallons to both of us. By the way your voice transcends beautifully in audio.
love yu guts
Paul and Wendy
Thank you so much for the kind words Paul & Wendy – they’ve warmed my heart!! I’m so pleased the audio resonated with you, I hope it remind you to treat yourselves kindly! You are such lovely souls, immensely grateful to have you in our lives! Big love!! Namaste ❤ xo