Where do you really live?

In a spiritual house – the one you see in the mirror each day!

It’s not surprising to see people take incredible care of their car; they wash, buff, wipe and shine every inch with immense pride. Its immaculate condition is only dampened by dark clouds or birds overhead. In the same way, there are others who cannot sleep at night unless their bricks & mortar house presents in the same spotless way.

Now, I see nothing wrong with taking great pride in those things which you love, but as we wax on-wax off the gloss of all the physical items we possess in our lives – do we ever stop a moment to think about the condition of the place we really live in?

The real house you live in.

To those who know me, or who’ve read my earlier post entitled Me, myself and I…Who’s listening to your self talk?, you’ve heard me refer to your physical body as your “house”. I got this endearing term many, many years ago from an intro page of a brilliant Wayne Dyer book,You’ll See It When You Believe It“. Let me quickly share it so you can soak in its full impact:

John Quincy Adams is well but the house in which he lives at the present time is becoming dilapidated. It's tottering on its foundations. Time and the seasons have nearly destroyed it. Its roof is pretty worn out. Its walls are much shattered and tremble with every wind. I think John Quincy Adams will have to move out of it soon. But he himself is quite well, quite well.

— John Quincy Adams

This short passage struck me so much, it brought tears to my eyes. But how very true it is! I may live in a house with four walls and roof, I may drive a car of metal and steel, I may work in a city with millions of people, but my true home is right here, wrapped around me.

I see it in the mirror every day; it gets weathered by the sun, moved around at a whim, worked, stressed, loved, healed, and so much more – yet it stays with me no matter how healthy or unwell it gets. This body of mine is truly my home.


Care for it until you move out.

From the moment I read the John Quincy Adams passage, the way I looked at my physical body completely changed. I realized I must tend to my house with great care so it can effectively protect me from the elements and shelter me for as long as I may live. Furthermore, I must take care it in such a way so it may be strong enough to shelter others if needed. This is when I finally understood that my life choices truly (honestly! really!) make, or break, my house.

Of course, the lifestyle choices you make are just that – yours – and it is important to do what makes you happy. But I just want to gently nudge your beautiful soul now…for when you make decisions about what you put into your body, onto your body, and surround yourself with – think for a moment, how is it treating your house? Is it strengthening the roof? Reinforcing the foundations? Insulating you from harm? Or is is stripping the paint from the walls? Creating a hole in the floor? Knocking the front door down?

Doesn’t this gorgeous analogy make a big difference about how you think and subsequently treat your physical self?

The 80-20 rule.

I know it’s not possible for a majority of us to live a ‘pristine perfect’, 100% organic, non-GMO, pure water, smoke-free, stress-free, hate-free, alcohol-free existence.  I myself enjoy a nice glass of Merlot or Shiraz from time to time, I don’t mind a pizza when I catch up with friends, and although fleeting – stress can and does rumble overhead in my life, too.

But the one thing I cannot (and will not) shake, is the knowing that whatever decision I make, effects my house. And its the only place I live, so I must treat it with care.

I maintain a even balance with something my husband told me about a decade ago, called the 80-20 rule: “It’s what you do 80% of the time that impacts you the most.” I’m speaking in logical generalities here, so don’t think I’m saying that doing something fatal 20% of the time will reach equilibrium if you eat organic quinoa for the 80% balance. What I mean is that it’s okay to give yourself some allowance – and dance on the edge a little – but keep the balance high in your true home‘s favour: 80% (or more) of nurturing food, water, exercise and rest.

Some people may not agree with this, but I think flexibility in your house is important. The glorious General Sherman Tree didn’t get to 84 meters tall (275 feet) and 2,500 years old by being completely rigid against the storms. Its flexibility has helped it get to where it is.

How to keep your foundations firm.

Don’t just take my word for it, go out and do your own research so you can follow what feels right to you. For those interested, here are some things I do to maintain my divine house:

  • Body: Maintain a healthy alkaline-acid diet (it’s been said that illness cannot flourish in a body which is more alkaline); and drink chlorine-free, flouride-free water often (well, you know how I feel about water! If not, read this post)
  • Body: Get out in nature, feel the sun, stretch and strengthen everyday!
  • Mind: Meditate – as often as you can – to quiet your mind (for those thinking ‘I don’t have time for meditation‘, I want you to know that meditation is beneficial no matter how short! Yes, even if only a couple of minutes!)
  • Mind: Be kind to yourself with loving & supportive affirmations (you can read more about my thoughts on affirmations here)
  • Soul: Be yourself and be proud of who you truly are!
  • Soul: Share your gifts and love – openly send and receive it – as much as you can, whenever you can.

Huff and puff, and blow my spiritual house down?

Do you now see where you really live? Has this post helped or hindered your ability to take care of it in anyway? How do you keep your foundations firm? I enjoy hearing comments and learning from others, so whether you agree or not, please comment below! ❤ Namaste!

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37 thoughts on “What condition is your (spiritual) house in?”

  1. Thank you so much, in all of my 54yrs , i have never looked at my body as a house, and how very true it is. For many years i was bulimic , and always hated my body. I beleive it started due to my mother and father calling me fat, and my mother putting me up on a stage at a weight watchers meeting when i was 10yrs old, to get weighed in. That poor 10yr old had no idea why she was being humiliated and that feeling stuck with me through many years . The years have passed, and i no longer look at food as the enemy, but a sustance i can make choices over. I do still try and beat myself up for being bad sometimes, but know how to pull myself out of bad habits and feelings. I truly beleive how we feel is how we think. Change the way we feel, then automatically changes the way we think. Not as easy as it sounds , but a graeat start. Thank you for your wonderful insight Xx

    1. Thank you so much for stopping by Elaine, and for sharing your story! What a journey you’ve been on, and how far you’ve come! I’m so proud of you – keeping doing the best you – that’s all you can as of yourself 🙂 Keep shining! x

  2. Really enjoy listening to all of your videos… Thank you! What you have shared is not unfamiliar to me. I like your 80-20 rule and look to live within those guidelines.

  3. I spend a lot of time trying to “feel” confortable in different places, like a lost soul searching for a home, a homeless… Day to day, trying to heal my self as much as I heal others.. Day to day, trying to be stable and calm, I’m in the path way to feel my physical body as my temple, or house, so my spirit or soul, feels aligned to my body, as it belongs to each other, so no need to found love in others rather than in myself.. Thanks…

  4. Quite an eye opener…never thought of my body this way…
    How true it is that we normally take care of our worldly house if it shows any sign of damage, but for our real and the most precious house, we are sometimes very careless.
    Loved it…thanks !
    Hug you ?

  5. D. La'Laine Holmes

    This is truly an eye opener because I know I have had a very low opinon of myself, and needs to change starting now.

  6. Yes, I agree. I do follow the same guidelines already, but I can use more meditation time. The health of our physical house is so important. Thank you for your wise words. I am so grateful!

  7. I just love the way you say namaste!
    You are giving so much of positive vibes and feel lucky now to have a guidance from you. Heartfelt thank you and namaste ?

    1. Thank you so much for stopping by Christina, and bless! I’m glad that you’re awareness heightened with this blog! Take care of that spiritual house sweet friend, it serves you well! Big love x

  8. That analogy make perfect sense. We all have a spiritual house we must care for because don’t know when it will crumble.

  9. This really helped me to put into perspective how important it is to take care of my body-the only home my spirit has- and has encouraged me to do better. going to start jogging with my kids and the dog, cut back on smoking and junk food and drinking more water and eating healthier stuff..this will also help with emotional barriers of mine too since ill be physically happier. thanks a lot for this podcast <3

  10. excellent as well as an eye opener article. i love my body and i take very good care of it, Thank you Mellisa,

  11. I love everything about this blog post. I feel strongly about all that you have mentioned, and truly appreciate how you very clearly put into words that truly sends a message of the importance of our “home”. I will be sure to share this post.

    With the upmost Gratitude- Danielle Coco 🙂

    1. Hi Danielle, thank you so much for stopping by – and I’m so happy to hear this post resonates with you! I truly believe we must take care of our ‘spiritual house’ 🙂 Thank you in advance for sharing, big love to you xo

  12. Thanks very much Melissa for this beautiful article once again. I have always known that it is was important to care of our body with a healthy life, healthy diet as much as possible and it has become clear when I realized many years ago that our body was the house in which our soul was living. And yes it is so important to look after our soul’s house. Love and Blessings on your way

    1. Thank you so much for stopping by Corinne, I’m so happy this blog resonated with you and made sense 🙂 Keep taking care of the home your beautiful soul lives in sweet friend! #biglove x

  13. Yep, my body is my home and I was completely a mess on the inside, beaten, abused, shy and afraid. Took my mother’s vibration. I’m very high sensitive..
    Constantly ill, tyerd, diseases, allergies for food.
    I was told to behave, be brave as a child, be the roll model for my rebellious little sister, don’t fail exams, don’t disappoint my parents, later on I was told to look nice on the outside, do my hair, dress nice and put some makeup on before your boyfriend got home. Be a good person.
    I lived for a long time like that.
    I was treated carefully of my illness and being tyerd all the time, please rest before you come to visit.
    In relationships I was the caring person, often put my self at the end.
    After having a little boy, I put him first, gave him what I didn’t get, he was a challenge ?, I socialized him, I defended him, let him take his own time to do everything, not by the books. We read a lot, watched the news every day later on for grown-ups. I said every day I loved him.
    After I left his father, I had two more long relations. The last one I broke down. I couldn’t eat normal, I couldn’t cook, I was only sleeping, I was lost, and I broke of the relationship, had a lot of fights with my son, after the last one, he got a room elsewhere. Now we are one again, and he takes care of me, wellbeing, cheers me up, compliments me when I had a good day, listens at my stories towards my spiritual path, I help him where ever I can. Now it’s time to take better care of myself..

    1. Hi Simone, thank you so much for stopping by and reading my blog — and for sharing your journey! Bless, you’ve been through so much – but what I’m very glad to see what your last line: “Now it’s time to take better care of myself..” 🙂 Very true, you deserve it, and when you take care of yourself, everything unfolds as it should! Keep shining sweet friend! xo

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