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You ask “What of me is beautiful?” Then the God within replies, “Everything.” It’s time to love yourself…


Click the “play” button above to listen to the audio.

I have a little personal story to share today my sweet friends. So if you can join me, sit back and relax, and let’s rewind this ridiculous thing called “time” back many, many years to when I was in my early twenties and attending university. Back to a time when I couldn’t see any beauty in me, to a day when the term “love yourself” wasn’t about clarity, but vanity.

Why me?

It was early morning as I stood in front of the mirror, turning from one side to the other, to see how I looked from every angle possible. I perfect-just-as-you-are-091was only going to one of my university classes that day, and although I had no suitor to impress, for some reason it was important for me to ‘look good’. Sucking my stomach in, I placed my hands just so, in order to hide my hips from view and silently sighed, “How come I got stuck with this body?

I’d given up on my outfit, and surrendered to the fact that I was never going to achieve Super Beauty, something it seemed every other girl had, but me. I leaned into the mirror to put on my eyeliner. I got frustrated at how my eyelids didn’t fold back right and how my eyelashes were straight and not naturally luscious like the television ads. My nose wasn’t straight and my eyebrows not full enough.

Arghh!

That’s it, enough! I slammed my make-up down, picked up my shoulder bag and charged out the door. By the time I arrived to the school grounds, I was convinced I would disgust everyone who saw me. In my mind, I was a fat, frumpy, ugly ogre stomping to class, making all the innocent villagers flee in sheer terror.

Getting perspective.

After what seemed like an eternity of sitting uncomfortably in a stadium-sized 3-hour class, it was time to head home. I remember that it felt like a dark cloud was enveloping my head; I was utterly dismayed at my fabricated misfortune of being a hideous creature. As I charged down the city street to my car, my unpleasant reverie was broken when someone quickly stepped to my right. I looked over my shoulder to find a homeless man walking next to me, who I had passed only a few feet before, trying to keep pace.

Do you mind if I walk with you, just for a moment miss?” he asked me with a toothless smile.

I was so confused, “Uh, sure.” I snapped back, not having the keenness of insight or patience of kindness to understand his real motive. I didn’t look at him again, but I could see him bobbing along in my peripheral vision.

I don’t often get to be near such a beautiful thing,” he mumbled, and then held his head down.

My chest welled up with a mixture of anger (What!? Are you coming onto me?!) and pride (Aww, what a sweet thing to say!); but I didn’t say a thing and just kept walking.

My new ‘friend’ saw me to the cross walk, bid me a very gentlemanly farewell, and disappeared back into the urban jungle from which he popped out of. I was still in shock from what had just passed, but it was becoming less of an angry shock, and more of a humbled one, as I realized that he simply paid me a compliment. He felt like he could brighten my day, and I could brighten his, and for just those few moments, he saw this hideous creature as beautiful. I never saw him again.

wild-flowerIt’s time to love yourself, as you are.

As I reached my car, I suddenly stopped in my tracks. Somehow, amid all the clouds surrounding my head, I saw a very small purple wild flower growing from out of the dark and dirty concrete ground. It was gently waving in the soft breeze, as though silently wishing, hoping to be seen.

I pulled my shoulder bag off, and let it fall to the ground, as I sat down in the middle of the parking lot to stare at this little creature. Time slowed down; I could see every little detail on it: it’s tiny lilac petals, many of which were bent from being driven over; it’s yellow pollen, much of which had been swept away by the wind or carried away by bees; it’s sweet little green arms, so twisted from trying to break free from the concrete prison it was trapped in.

Without any thought, I said myself, “I don’t often get to be near such a beautiful thing“. And then I cried. After quite a few moments, I muttered, “What of me is this beautiful?” And the God within me replied, “Everything.

I realized that little wildflower and I had a lot in common. There are countless flowers in the world, in all shapes, sizes, and colours – all gloriously beautiful with their scars and troubles. They will stand out, in their own way, in their own time. Just like my little purple wildflower did for me. And as I did for the homeless man. And now, in hindsight, I see, just like the homeless man did for me.

It’s your imperfections which make you perfect my sweet friend. You are beautiful, just as you are. Please remember that, always. Namaste.

25 thoughts on “Love yourself. Your imperfections make you perfect.”

  1. I have just picked up on my course after a two month break and have just re-read your story. It has given me a warm glow inside and I could hear a voice inside my head saying “you are beautiful too” it made me smile and repeat “I am beautiful too”. I needed to have this reminder today thank you so much Melissa.

  2. this brought tears to my eyes. the line “you are beautiful just as you are” no one says that to me, or anyone I guess. We need to say it to each other and ourselves more I guess.

    1. Thank you so much for stopping by Emma – I’m so glad this post resonated with you! And I agree, we must indeed remember to love ourselves, “imperfections” and all. Big love to you sweet friend!

  3. Hello, Melissa,
    I am taking your Powerful Self Healing in 5 Simple Steps, and I find myself on your site for the second time today. What struck me after listening to this podcast was something Brenee Brown said in one of her audiobooks. She said you can’t love anyone else, if you don’t love yourself. I argued with her! Pretty sure I won, too. I have 3 wonderful children, and I vividly remember when my daughter came home from school in the third grade. She had a fight with her best friend, and she basically told my daughter that she was not all that and a bag of chips, pretty harsh. I went member by member over our extended family and told her how much she was loved, I brought up her amazing abilities and that she was exactly as God intended her to be! She went to school the next day and told her exbest friend that she WAS all that and a bag of chips! I love my children with all my heart and soul! I have no doubt that I spoke her truth! But I could not apply the same thing to myself.
    I have known for around 30 years I am empathetic and very intuitive. (I’ll be 50 this year.). Just had no knowledge how to protect myself.
    I grew up with a narcissistic mother, then the first guy to pay attention to me, I married him. He is also a narcissist.
    My grandma died almost two years ago. The very moment I walked into her house, after her passing, I realized she and my grandpa were the only two people to ever love me unconditionally. Except my current husband, we just celebrated our 25th anniversary. He was to me by God. And I am so very grateful for him!
    Within six months of my grandma, I was severely depressed, I hurt so badly that I just wanted to die. I was in Intensive Outpatient Therapy for two weeks, 40 hours per week. Then for four hours, three times per week. I said I was a ‘hot mess’ to my counselor, she strongly disagreed with me. Apparently grief stirs up wounds from childhood, and a relationship that had ended over 27 years prior! I was diagnosed with PTSD from early childhood through high school; I knew I had PTSD from my ex-husband. I haven’t worked 15 months due to severe anxiety and shame.
    So now, it’s my turn! My time to work on me!
    I KNOW that I am enough. This means to me that I am enough just as I am; I don’t need to find or buy anything. Just as God intended!
    Thank you for your beautiful words that lead to a moment of synchronicity for me. So wonderful!
    I feel a little lighter, it’s a great start!
    Namaste, Michelle

    1. Thank you so much for stopping by Michelle, and sharing your amazing story! You’ve clearly been through so much – and have held up so many others – so I’m incredibly proud that you are going to honour yourself, love yourself, and shine that beautiful light of yours! You are most welcome, too – it means a lot to know that this came at the right time for you on your journey! #biglove to you Michelle, keep going x

  4. You exude beauty, from the inner to the outer.
    I remember when at one time I didn’t know how to love my self at all. Then one day it was pointed out that I had a good heart. That’s when I saw the outer beauty as well.

  5. Hi Melissa,
    Thank you for reminding me that I am perfect just the way God made me.
    I loved your touching story and the reminder that the God within loves everything about me.
    Blessings
    Shirley

  6. Amazing how sometimes you come across someone who tells you something or an article that resonates with you that seems so perfectly timed. This article was just that for me. It is time to love myself, as I am. Thank you.

    1. Hi Laura-Ann, thank you so much for visiting my blog, and bless! Isn’t it amazing how messages get delivered at the perfect time, when we’re ready to hear/see them!? Wonderful! I am so happy you are going to start loving yourself, as you are — you’re already perfect and whole sweet friend! Big love to you! xo

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